I AM A PROUD PROSTITUTE
I am a proud prostitute! This is no laughing matter, neither am I a laughing stock.How many books authored by prostitutes have you read? Have you read the accounts by Kerala's Nalini Jameela, or by Dolores French who is a political activist in the USA now, or by Catherine Millet? Do they talk about degraded life? Largely not. Ups and downs in life is there for everybody's share.
I am a thirty year old female "prostitute". My real name is Kavita but my professional name is Kitty. Name hardly matters to me. I want to dispel from your minds cobwebs of myths, misunderstanding and misgivings about my "profession". I want to dispel from your heart attitudes of mockery, condescension, rejection, pity and hatred. Men are the main culprits in all these respects and females hold these men on their shoulders to show that they are not on "non-virtuous path".
I will make this short so that you don't get tired of me. Firstly, I wish you people abandon the word "prostitute" and take it out of the dictionary. This has remained always a men's world, and they only indulge in, perpetrate and perpetuate shamelessness of any kind. They are party to every wretchedness and then pretending to be staying aloof they would stamp them dogs, condemn and hang them! What kind of a horrible word "prostitute" is, as invented by man, carrying the worst human stigma as if we are worse than rapists, murderers, looters and arsonists! And I hate the term "commercial sex-worker" even more.It shows us in a clinically more demeaning light. After all, the old word "moll" was not that bad. They call them hookers in America which is not too bad. Why don't you call us simply "comfort women" and be done with it? I am a proud "prostitute" but hate those who call us by that horrible name.
Who says we are selling our body? Our body is intact and not a drop gets out of our systems. It is the men who are paying us to part with a part of their body, their semen. Those of you who are housewives, you are worse off than us. You too "sell your body" at night after doing all the donkey's work at home for free during the day. You got stuck with one man but I have variety and freedom.
You people don't have to pity us.There are people worse off than us whom we folks pity. They are everywhere, on footpaths, streets, drain pipes, sewers, suffering degradation worse than animals, not having enough to eat, to wear or any place to stay. They are sick, weak, battered and can't even "sell their bodies". I have a place to stay. I have a 'yajman' who is called a pimp, another horrible word, but he takes care of my needs. He beats me or ill treats me sometimes but I have seen housewives getting much worse from their husbands. You don't talk about it. And some of you get burnt because you did not give dowries! We are better off. Don't please pity us.
Most of you women are ugly. I am where I am because I am beautiful and attractive. Those are god's gifts to me. I am proud of that. I get upset when a man thinks that I am not up to his expectation but that seldom happens. In fact most of us in our condition have to be good-looking and presentable.
Some of you females would have gone through traumatic rape but for us.That is the reason that our "profession" was not voted illegal in places in Europe even in the Middle Ages. Men come to us for their outlet or else you would not be safe walking in the streets in the evening.
I hate it when people say that "prostitution" is the oldest profession on earth! Have they proof? How does it become a profession just by the act of giving pleasure for money or kind or free. Can the act of cooking food by housewives in the houses become a profession? Can the act of raising children in the houses be called a profession? After all the housewives are financially supported by their working husbands. Men do stupid categorisations. If a person donates blood to a blood bank say once in three months, he becomes a "professional" donor ! Can any thing and everything be called "professional''?
True, lots of things have gone wrong in the course of our fraternity's or rather sorority's history. If it is such a self-defeating evil, would we be alive? They say that the sweetest mango will have a dead wasp in it. How ungrateful of men that after exploiting our sweetness they label us with callous ingratitude!
In the long human history, several forms of social institutions have survived or thrived. Have you read the book "The History of Human Marriage" by Westermarck? It was legal in Egypt to marry one's own sister. It has been expected of eskimos to treat their guests by offering them the ladies of the houses. There is the strange gotul practice amongst the Gond tribes in India even today whereby boys and girls are allowed to cohabit before marriage. The rainbow of man's history has witnessed myriad colours. Getting paid for offering physical pleasure is amongst the least destructive in society.
The root of what is viewed as bad or evil has been the creation of man. Often of blind, illogical men! These men were the ones responsible for fighting wars for religion or greed, for fracturing societies, for condemning women to death after calling them witches, and for perpetrating every conceivable atrocity on earth. And these men come to us for comfort in the night and condemn us the next day.
Note: I was hesitating to write this since my experience is that the readers here don't like my tarnishing my own image even in a little bit even on an imaginative basis!
This impersonated essay is not meant to favour or promote prostitution or promiscuity. This for me is an area devoid of any experience, but materials are there from oral history and written history. I was only keen to say that the reality and permanency of this institution deserves to be recognized, and better regulations should be introduced. What Kavita says is actually in the manner of an anti-thesis and if it leads to a Hegelian synthesis, a better perspective would have evolved.
No offence to readers or any section of them is intended at all.
I liked very much your article. I personally think that comfort women deserve all our admiration and gratitude, as they are incredibly generous when providing intimate wellbeing by sharing their most precious and intimate treasure with such detachement and will to comfort. Beyond defying our very wrong misconceptions and unfair discrimination, I would like to better understand your motivations, personal reward, self realization and self esteem enrichment you get from your profession and from the interaction with your customers. Cheers, Gabriel.
This is an old blog by me and I wonder how it came to your attention! I don't even properly remember the contents!Thanks for your valuable and kind comments!
every word drips with honesty... cases of married women from 'respectable' houses who are treated horribly are visibly on the daily news... atleast you are your own savior. hats off. beautifully written.
i really like your views and fully support you. i have respect for all of you from the bottom of my heart keep writing and help in strengthening society
I want to marry you.....will you? if yes plz contact on firstname.lastname@example.org
I am also a prostitute and VERY proud of it! I'm working in Amman, Jordan.
many thanks for coming in.
so much can be said and written about prostitution.i have covered really nothing except one thing.it is that the downtrodden in society have their pride too.what you and i look down upon as debased life (from force of circumstances, maybe) may not be totally true from their angle.
the bulk of women in prostitution are there by force, not by choice. most of them are hiv positive, again not because they wanted it that way. a very large number of women started when they were young, some as old as 7, raped by men who thought, the younger they are, the "purer" they must be.
prostitutes cater to the basest of human instincts, not because they want to, but because if they didnt, they would be beaten senseless and their bastard children left to starve.
iam still waiting to see where the pride of being a prostitute comes from.
hi ramesh khoslaji,
thanks a lot! our country is perhaps one of the most hypocritical. please just see, gujarat has a prohibition policy only because that is where bapuji gandhi was born!!!!! the policy works in full breach!!!!!
we have a netaji commission still trying to prove that he is alive at the age of 120 or whatever!!!!!
thanks again and cheers!!!